


Somethin' Stupid

by adventarson



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Basketball Player Mark Lee (NCT), Donghyuck is obsessed with The Notebook, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Past Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Lee Minho, Somethin' Stupid - Robbie Williams & Nicole Kidman, and the other dreamies are on the team (except for chenle i'm so sorry love), lisgiddit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-10-16 02:53:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17541284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adventarson/pseuds/adventarson
Summary: Mark screws his eyes shut and grips Donghyuck’s waist tighter as Donghyuck bites his throat lightly, and his breath hitches again.“I love you,” Mark gasps. Donghyuck freezes, and Mark’s brain reels. “Wait, shit, shit, shit, fuck, Donghyuck–” But Donghyuck is scrambling off his lap and rushing out of the door. Mark lets his head fall back against the back of the couch, closing his eyes. “Shitshitshitshit–”





	Somethin' Stupid

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this whole thing in about four hours when I had a fever, so, um. I had the lyrics of Somethin' Stupid by Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman stuck in my head, and this just kind of... happened. I just left it in a folder for, like, two months and then I came back and rewrote it three times and it just wouldn't stop bugging me until I'd finished it.
> 
> So, here it is. Enjoy, I guess.

It all starts at Yoonoh’s party. No, wait, that’s not the whole truth. It doesn’t start with Donghyuck failing his Statistical Analysis exam either, although that’s definitely a contributing factor. It’s kind of hard to pinpoint exactly when it happened, because it’s been happening for… Probably years now. But if Mark had to say it started sometime, it probably started when Donghyuck broke up with Minho a couple of months ago.

Donghyuck had been completely head over heels. Mark had known him since Donghyuck was thirteen, and he’d never seen him this excited about a person before. He’d been there to see every single relationship Donghyuck had been in and every crush he’d had, even the horrifying three weeks he’d thought he was in love with Jeno on Mark’s basketball team, and he’d never been as excited about any of them as he’d been about Minho. Honestly, Mark hadn’t liked any of Donghyuck’s boyfriends, but this Minho guy had really gotten on his nerves. He’d put up with him because he made Donghyuck happy, but he had a long list of things he didn’t like about Minho.

First on his list was the fact that Minho was two years older than Donghyuck. When you’re eighteen, two years really make a big difference, and this Minho guy had way more experience with relationships than Donghyuck had.

The second thing Mark didn’t like about Minho was that he was constantly teasing people and making fun of others. He was so incredibly annoying, constantly laughing and teasing everyone around him. (If Mark thought about it hard enough, which he didn’t like to do, he came to the conclusion that Donghyuck did exactly the same thing, somehow without making Mark so irritated he had to leave the room. But, again, Mark didn’t like to think about it too much).

The third, and maybe most important, thing Mark didn’t like about Minho was that he hadn’t been anywhere near as serious about Donghyuck as Donghyuck had been about him. To be fair, Donghyuck had told him they met at The Vision, the bar downtown that literally everyone knows you go to if you want a hookup, no strings attached. But still. This was the reason they’d broken up, too. Minho had been heartbroken after his last boyfriend had moved halfway across the world to Australia or something, Mark wasn’t really paying attention to that part, and Minho had wanted a distraction–something he swore he’d told Donghyuck when they’d met when Mark confronted him about it.

Whichever way it was, Donghyuck was crying on Mark’s couch and Mark was doing his best to supply him with tissues and grapefruit tea. That night had probably been where it really started. Donghyuck had fallen asleep on the couch with his head on Mark’s shoulder, which wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, but when Mark had woken him up at two in the morning to walk him to bed so he wouldn’t get a crick in his neck, Donghyuck had first insisted that Mark tuck him in and then insisted that he stay. So Mark stayed, with Donghyuck’s breath across his throat and his hair tickling his nose and his arm draped across Mark’s chest. Yeah, that was probably when it had started.

· · ·

“Yoonoh’s got that party tomorrow, you coming?” Donghyuck glances at Mark over a stack of books. Mark flips a page in his own book.

“Nah, I need to study,” he answers distractedly, scribbling notes on a stack of flashcards. He finishes scribbling and peeks over the stack of books. “Wouldn’t want to end up like you,” he teases. Donghyuck scowls.

“It’s not my fucking fault my professor assigned us the wrong readings,” he snaps.

“Okay, sorry,” Mark says. “I didn’t mean it like that.” Donghyuck softens a little.

“You better not have,” he mumbles, “or they’ll be hard-pressed to identify your pretty face.” Mark snorts. That’s unusually crude, even for Donghyuck, so he glances over at him again. He’s hunched over his Statistics textbook, drowning in a hoodie Mark swears is his, tapping his pencil furiously against his notepad. His eyebrows are furrowed, and he’s scowling down at the numbers. Mark kind of wants to reach out and smooth his frown out with his thumb. He absolutely does not.

“Do you want me to go?” Mark asks tentatively. Donghyuck snorts.

“It’s not like I need you, knock yourself down a peg.” He pauses his tapping, carefully drawing out a single number. “But yeah, that could be fun or whatever.” Mark giggles a little as Donghyuck sighs and erases the number he’d just written. For someone so incredibly affectionate and cuddly, Donghyuck can be surprisingly emotionally constipated. Mark pretends to think about it for a minute.

“Yeah, sure, I’ll go,” Mark says after a while. Donghyuck doesn’t look up.

“Cool,” is all he replies. In reality, Mark had made up his mind as soon as Donghyuck had asked. He just didn’t want him to know that.

· · ·

The first test Donghyuck had ever failed was his very first AP Physics test. He’d never failed a test before, and he cried the whole evening. Mark had gone home with Donghyuck to comfort him, and they’d watched The Notebook for the first time. Mark had had trouble sleeping, so he’d stayed up and ended up talking to Donghyuck’s older brother, who explained that it was mostly because Donghyuck wasn’t used to being challenged in school. He’d been moved up a grade, and now that he was on everyone else’s level he hadn’t realised he’d need to study.

“So he’s some sort of prodigy?” Mark asked. Haknyeon laughed, sounding just like his little brother.

“Nah, he just learns quickly.”

Mark had counted the glow-in-the-dark stars stuck on Donghyuck’s ceiling until he fell asleep, promising them to help Donghyuck study for the next test.

· · ·

Yoonoh’s party is pretty much like every other bad college party Mark has been to. There are college boys in muscle tees and college girls in short shorts, drinking and dancing and playing dumb games and puking on the front porch. Mark keeps to the edge of the living room, doing his best to not get drunk, because he’d rather not notice how good Donghyuck looks right now. Donghyuck is laughing at something, head thrown back as he dances to something with a bassline so deep Mark feels it in his chest. His soft, brown hair is sticking to his forehead, and there’s a thin sheen of sweat all over him that shouldn’t look attractive but does. But then again, if Mark was drunk, maybe he’d be less discreet as he watches how Donghyuck’s shirt sticks to his back and how well the white contrasts with his bronzed skin. And maybe, if Mark was drunk, he’d be stupid enough to go out there and dance with Donghyuck, put his hands on Donghyuck’s hips and laugh with him at something stupid and unimportant.

Mark downs the rest of his soda and escapes to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass from a cabinet, he turns on the tap and lets the water run until it’s cold. He fills his glass, then puts it to the side and cups his hands to run some of it through his hair. It’s the start of the term, still hot, and with Yoonoh’s small house filled with dancing, sweaty university students the temperature is verging on uncomfortable.

The song outside ends, and the kitchen is flooded with sweaty people looking for more drinks. Mark downs his water and tries to escape again, but he’s recognised and stopped by first Yuta and Sicheng, then Taeyong and then Lucas before he actually gets out of the kitchen. There’s a bathroom upstairs, Mark remembers, so he climbs over a couple making out in the staircase and finds a queue to the toilets. It’s blissfully quiet up here, and the queue isn’t too long, so Mark decides to stick it out. He doesn’t even really need to pee, but being in line for the toilets gives him a good reason for not being downstairs dancing. The queue crawls forward, and Mark starts to lose track of time. The corridor is narrow, with no windows and close to no lighting, all doors closed and locked. The bass from the music downstairs thuds through the walls, but Mark can’t make out anything of the actual song and the basslines all sound the same. The corridor feels a bit surreal like that, Mark’s head spinning slightly and the carpet spinning with it.

· · ·

“Mark, why don’t you date?” They’d been watching The Notebook for the fiftieth time, Donghyuck’s head in Mark’s lap and Mark’s fingers threading through Donghyuck’s hair. Mark carefully controls his reaction, even though Donghyuck’s eyes are glued to the screen of Mark’s laptop. He hums a little.

“I don’t know,” he lies. “I guess I’m trying to focus on my studies.” Donghyuck scoffs, half-laughing.

“Just tell me the truth, idiot. You don’t date because nobody’s good enough. You’re Mark Lee, class president, head of debate club, captain of the basketball team. Nobody lives up to your standards.” Mark laughs and tugs a little at Donghyuck’s hair. Donghyuck doesn’t know how uncomfortably close he is. Nobody’s good enough because nobody has hair soft, brown hair that slips so comfortably between Mark’s fingers, and they don’t tease and insult him relentlessly, and they don’t have laughs that make them look like the sun itself. Nobody’s good enough because there’s only one Donghyuck Lee. Mark tells him to shut up and watch the movie, and if he cries a little when the best friends end up happily ever after together, that’s nobody’s business.

· · ·

Mark tries to make his toilet run as long as possible, politely letting several people ahead of him in the line with smiles and _No, you go first_ s, _it’s not that bad_ s. But eventually there’s nobody left in line, and he just has to go. He does actually pee, because as ridiculous as it is to voluntarily wait in line for the toilet for forty-six minutes it’s even more ridiculous to wait in line for the toilet for forty-six minutes without even peeing. Mark washes his hands twice, fixes his hair and straightens out his shirt. He stands staring at himself in the mirror above the sink for a long moment, picking apart his own face until he barely recognises it. His eyes are a bit round, so he looks surprised most of the time, and his mouth is kind of small. He tries a cool scowl and regrets it. Someone knocks on the door, and Mark unlocks it with a sigh.

There’s not really anywhere else to go except back downstairs, unless he wants to pathetically shut himself in a bedroom, so Mark climbs back down the stairs. He doesn’t immediately spot Donghyuck, which is both worrying and a relief. He grabs another soda and places himself at the edge of the room again, nodding his head and tapping his foot a little to the beat of the song. Suddenly Donghyuck materialises from the crowd, and Mark startles a little and does his best not to stare.

“Where have you been?” Donghyuck asks and grabs Mark’s soda. Mark tries to gauge how drunk he is.

“I went to the toilet,” Mark says, trying not to stare at Donghyuck’s exposed throat as he takes a long drink from Mark’s soda.

“There was a queue,” he adds, in case Donghyuck thought he was escaping from him. Which he was, but there’s no need for Donghyuck to know that.

“I was looking for you,” Donghyuck informs him casually, and Mark thinks he must be drunk. But he looks completely steady as he takes another sip of Mark’s soda, and his speech is even, so then again, maybe not.

“Are you drunk?” Mark asks, just to make sure. He needs to know which Donghyuck he needs to be prepared to handle.

“Why? You want to kidnap me?” Mark sputters and Donghyuck laughs. “Yeah, a little. Mostly tipsy.” Donghyuck takes a step forward, and Mark takes a step backward, so Donghyuck takes another step forward, walking Mark backward until his back hits a wall. Mark giggles nervously. Donghyuck is looking at Mark, and Mark feels a bit like a deer caught in headlights. Donghyuck’s eyes are so dark, so steady, and his chin is tilted just so, a small smile on his lips. Mark swears someone must have spiked his soda, because he swears he sees Donghyuck’s eyes flit down to Mark’s mouth.

“What–” Then Donghyuck is leaning forward, pausing a centimetre away from Mark’s mouth. Mark can feel the question, can feel Donghyuck’s breath against his lips, and when Mark doesn’t shove him away, Donghyuck leans forward to press his mouth to Mark’s. Mark doesn’t react for a solid second, brain whirring through possible malfunctions and misinterpretations before finally settling that this is actually happening. Donghyuck is actually kissing him. Donghyuck leans back a little, and Mark stares at him from an angle he never thought he’d find himself in. Donghyuck’s eyes are still half-closed, and one of his hands is playing with the hem of Mark’s shirt, the soda unimportant and placed somewhere to the left.

“This is fine, right?” Donghyuck murmurs, still playing with the hem of Mark’s shirt. “It’s okay, it doesn’t have to mean anything.”

“Yeah, no, sure, it doesn’t have to mean anything,” Mark agrees, not sure what he’s agreeing to as the words leave his mouth. Donghyuck smells of sweat and lavender, and he’d tasted like Mark’s soda, and Mark honestly just wants to kiss him again. Donghyuck pauses a little, so Mark, in a brief moment of courage, leans forward to kiss Donghyuck.

Donghyuck lets out a little breath of surprise, but kisses back. Donghyuck is a good kisser, Mark realises hazily after a while, giving Mark just enough pressure to dare to surge forward and then leaning back a little to make Mark chase his mouth. It’s making Mark’s head spin, and he can feel his hands shaking where they’re pressed to the wall behind him. Donghyuck’s thumb slips under Mark’s shirt to draw small circles on his hip, and Mark’s brain shuts down. Donghyuck immediately stops, withdrawing his hand and taking a step back.

“Shit, sorry, that was a bit much.” Donghyuck looks so good, hair messy and cheeks flushed, Mark’s one remaining brain cell helps him nod a little. Donghyuck runs a hand through his hair, letting out a breath. “This isn’t a big deal, right? We don’t have to talk about it.” The room stops spinning for a moment, and Mark’s heart stops. He nods a few times too many.

“Yeah, it’s no big deal,” he croaks, taking another deep breath and squaring his shoulders.

“I saw Yuta leave with someone, so can I stay at yours?” Mark just nods again and lets Donghyuck elbow them through the crowd.

Mark’s still shaking so bad when they get on the bus that he drops his bus card twice. Donghyuck scoffs at him, as if everything is normal. And maybe everything is normal, and Mark is just overreacting. It’s not a big deal, just like Donghyuck said. It doesn’t have to mean anything. Mark’s heart eventually slows, and his hands stop shaking, and he offers Donghyuck his bed and opts to sleep on the couch.

· · ·

Mark thinks he was fifteen or so when he first realised he was in love with Donghyuck. Or, at the time he thought it was a small crush. He just noticed things, like how cute Donghyuck’s cheeks were when he’d taken a big bite of pizza, and how Donghyuck scrunched his nose up when he was focusing really hard on beating Mark’s ass in Mario Kart, and how he’d tap his pencil three times against his writing pad, sigh, then tap another five times and sigh again whenever he was stuck on an equation. Mark hadn’t really known if he was into boys in general or if it was just Donghyuck, and honestly he still doesn’t really know. All he knew was that his heart stopped when Donghyuck put his head on his shoulder and that he kind of wanted to kiss his nose when he leaned across Mark to grab a handful of popcorn.

· · ·

They’d eaten breakfast together before Mark had to run to class, and everything was unsettlingly normal. Donghyuck hadn’t mentioned it, so Mark hadn’t either, and they’d just talked about how annoying Donghyuck’s Mechanics professor was and how exhausting it was when nobody on the basketball team replied to Mark’s emails asking them to confirm whether or not they were coming to practise.

About a week passes, and everything is completely normal. They text a lot, and it’s mostly Donghyuck insulting Mark’s taste in music and Mark replying that listening exclusively to Michael Jackson doesn’t exactly classify as a music taste, and they have lunch every day where they sit by the door and comment everyone who walks past (“ _Did you see Spinach Girl and Dickens guy look at each other? I bet at least four hours of sleep something happened at that Drama Department party yesterday_ ”).

“I have a basketball game on Friday, are you coming?” Mark asks, taking a bite of lasagna.

“I kinda need to study,” Donghyuck says, pushing his lump of lasagna around his plate. “I don’t want to fail another exam.” Mark is painfully aware of how similar this conversation is to the one they had a week ago, reversed.

“You never watch the game anyway, you can study there,” Mark says, half-teasing. Donghyuck thinks it over, then half-shrugs.

“Might as well spend another three hours with your ugly face, it can’t make that much of a difference.” Donghyuck has been to every single basketball game Mark has ever played, so it’s not like he’s actually asking. Asking is more of a formality.

· · ·

Mark’s very first basketball game was one of the weirdest experiences of his life. He’d just joined the team, he knew very little about basketball, and he didn’t know anyone on the team. He’d just seen the sign-up sheet in the hallway and remembered his teacher saying that after-school activities and sports were good ways of earning extra credit, so he’d just written his name on the sign-up sheet in the hallway and showed up to practise.

And then, a couple of weeks later, little fourteen-year-old Mark was standing on a basketball court, the youngest on the entire team, with a ball in his hands and a bleacher full of people shouting at him to shoot. So he did, and the rest he didn’t really remember. Donghyuck had been shouting the loudest, threatening to not share his Skittles with Mark tomorrow if he didn’t score.

After they’d lost by about twenty points, Mark’s mom took them to the diner in town and Mark and Donghyuck had shared a pizza with pineapple on it, even though Donghyuck hated pineapple pizza, because it was _Mark’s big day_.

· · ·

This game is much like all of the other games Mark’s ever played. Donghyuck sits all the way at the top of the bleachers, pretending he’s not watching, and Mark’s darting around the court shouting at his team to get it together. They’ve already got it together, mostly, with all the practising they’ve been doing, but Mark’s learned that shouting at them to get it together calms all of them down. He plays point guard, so he’s constantly spotting mistakes the others are making when they’re not where he needs them to be, and it’s stressful. Jaemin, who’s tallest on the team and usually plays centre, is constantly half a step too fast, but Jeno almost somehow makes up for it by constantly being half a step too slow. Mark makes a mental note to shout at them about it in the locker room later, and dodges the other team to pass Renjun the ball. Renjun is tiny, so Mark was a little apprehensive at first, but what he lacks in size he makes up for in incredible accuracy and quick thinking, and being in the right places. Renjun scores, and Mark relaxes back into autopilot.

In the locker room after the game, Mark shouts at Jeno for being too slow, then gives him a hug when he explains that he’s really tired from an exam he had that morning, and then shouts at Jaemin for stumbling over everyone including himself, and Jaemin promises to have less coffee. He pats Renjun on the back and tells him to pass the ball to the others a bit more and he doesn’t really have anything to say to Jisung, who’s honestly too young to be on the team but he’s fast and tall and still growing and knows how to dribble, so Mark just ruffles his hair and calls them all in for a group hug. They all groan and call him a sentimental grandpa, but give him a hug anyway. Mark holds the door open as they all file out and then lets it fall shut behind them. He usually stays behind in the locker room to, as captain, analyse the game and pick out things they can work on for the next game. The others usually shower at home unless they have somewhere to be, but Mark likes to shower in the locker room. He’s still in his team captain headspace and it gives him time to think over the game like he needs to. He’s just pulled his shirt over his head when the door is kicked open and Donghyuck barges in. Mark jumps and holds his shirt against his chest as if it would make a difference.

“You’re such an _idiot_ –” Donghyuck stops mid-sentence and stares at Mark. “Do you always give your team pep talks without your shirt on?” Mark clutches his shirt tighter.

“No, I was, uh, I was gonna have a shower,” Mark says, gesturing vaguely in the direction of the showers. Donghyuck slowly runs his eyes over Mark, then smiles and nods, turning to leave again.

“Don’t let me stop you,” he says, “I’ll wait outside.” Mark waits several minutes after the door has closed behind Donghyuck before he actually dares get into the shower. He does his best to think about the game, he really does, but he can’t really relax and focus. He’s out of the shower in record time and gets dressed as fast as he can. He’s drying his hair when Donghyuck barges in again.

“You do know that the locker room is team only,” Mark tries, still rubbing at his hair with his towel. He can only see Donghyuck’s sneakers, but he imagines he’s rolling his eyes.

“Yeah, whatever. Did we care about that in high school?” Mark remembers all the times they’d hung out and eaten crisps in the locker room, laughing at each other and talking about everything and nothing until the janitor kicked them out.

“I guess not,” Mark answers, shoving his towel and team uniform into his bag. He’s got his back to Donghyuck, but he swears he feels it as Donghyuck takes a few steps closer.

“You’re kinda cute when you’re all focused and bossy,” Donghyuck says quietly, and Mark whips around. Donghyuck smirks at Mark, and Mark imagines it has something to do with Mark’s facial expression, especially if it’s in any way reflecting what his gut is feeling.

It feels like somewhere right between bitterness and comfort when Donghyuck kisses him. Mark is bitter because it doesn’t mean anything, and it’s comfort because Donghyuck is his very best friend who he’d trust with his life. Donghyuck tastes of popcorn, and Mark sighs a little into his mouth. Donghyuck slowly backs them against the row of lockers, and Mark presses his palms to the col metal behind him. Donghyuck laughs a little, and Mark can feel him smiling.

“You’re allowed to, like, touch me, you know,” Donghyuck says, still smiling. Mark swallows and carefully puts his hands on Donghyuck’s waist. Donghyuck laughs through his nose and leans back in to kiss him. Donghyuck’s hands have just slid from his shoulders to his chest, right over Mark’s rabbiting heart, when the door swings open again. Mark jumps and sees Jaemin with a huge grin on his face.

“I just forgot my keys,” Jaemin says, holding up what is indeed a bunch of keys. “I’ll just leave you two alone,” he says, still grinning, and backs out of the locker room. The door swings shut behind him, and Mark lets his head fall back against the lockers behind him with a groan.

“He’s literally never going to let me live this down,” Mark says, staring at the ceiling. Donghyuck just laughs.

“You’ll survive,” he says and Mark looks back down to see him zipping up Mark’s bag and handing it to him. Mark accepts it and swings it over his shoulder.

· · ·

The first party Mark ever goes to, he goes to with Donghyuck. It was actually a party for the basketball team, but by then Mark and Donghyuck were a package deal and the team had invited him, too. The school’s team was small enough to not be divided by age, so the party was thrown by one of the seniors on the team. Party might have been a misnomer, honestly–Kun and Sangyeon had driven to get takeout and Dongyoung had let them set up a movie on his laptop. The team felt like a family as they all laughed at Kevin when he burned the microwave popcorn, and then kept laughing when Jaehyun complained that the second batch of popcorn that Jacob had made also tasted burnt. Letting Sicheng pick the movie was probably a bad idea, as he put on the single scariest movie Mark had ever seen, but it was okay because Donghyuck only laughed at him a little and let him bury his face in his shoulder and told him when the ghost was gone so he could look again.

So maybe Mark had been in love for longer than he’d originally thought.

· · ·

The next week is completely normal. Well. Jaemin wiggles his eyebrows at Mark when he walks into the practise room on Monday, but thankfully doesn’t say anything. Jeno and Renjun both glance first at each other, then at Mark, so Jaemin’s most likely told them. They don’t say anything either, though, so Mark does his best to ignore them.

Mark has just gotten home from an excruciating practise when Donghyuck calls.

“What?” Mark snaps, holding the phone a good decimetre from his ear as he shoves at the dishes in his sink.

“Hey, sunshine,” Donghyuck retorts. Mark sighs and lets the spoon he’s holding clatter back into the sink.

“Sorry. Practise was awful.” He decides to leave the dishes and collapses onto the sofa instead.

“What did they do this time?” And so Donghyuck listens patiently as Mark complains about how Jaemin isn’t drinking any less coffee and about how Renjun keeps showing up late because he’s working on his big art piece and forgets the time and about how Jisung just won’t stop growing and the team really can’t afford new uniforms.

“…and if that wasn’t enough, Jaemin keeps wiggling his eyebrows at me! And he’s told Renjun and Jeno, too, so I truly never will live that down.” Donghyuck goes quiet. Mark’s stomach drops and he closes his eyes. They’d agreed not to talk about it, and here he was, talking about it. How stupid can you _get_ –

“About that,” Donghyuck interrupts Mark’s train of thought. “I’m gonna go down to The Vision later, do you wanna come with?” Mark’s brain seizes up. The Vision is that casual-hookup bar where Donghyuck met Minho.

“You want to go to a bar?” Mark asks dumbly. He can practically hear Donghyuck rolling his eyes.

“Yes, Mark, I want to go to a bar. And I asked if you wanted to come with me.” Mark’s brain is whirring at about a hundred kilometres an hour, because Donghyuck had said about that when Mark had mentioned the locker room thing and proceeded to suggest they go to a bar downtown famous for casual hookups that nobody talked about. He hates the anticipation curling at the pit of his stomach, and he hates himself for planning what he’s going to wear before he’s even agreed to go.

“Yeah, sure,” he hears himself say, and his stomach twists. An hour and a half later, Mark has had a shower, put on the fruity cologne Donghyuck got him for his birthday as a joke when Mark turned eighteen (“ _It’s a boring grown-up gift, get it?_ ”) and gotten dressed in his favourite shirt that he knows flatters his chest and some jeans. He tells himself that this is exactly the amount of effort he always puts into going out. He doesn’t really bother making it believable, because he wouldn’t believe himself whichever way he said it.

The bar is pretty dodgy. Mark has been there a couple of times, most of them to pick up Donghyuck from uncomfortable situations. It’s just off-campus, squished between a 24-7 ramen place that Mark takes pride in never having been drunk enough to go to, and an antique store that closes at three in the afternoon and has an average clientele of 80-year-old widows. It’s just as narrow, if not even narrower, from the inside, with a long bar along one wall and a couple of bar tables along the other. Mark finds Donghyuck sitting at one of the bar tables closest to the door with a bowl of crisps, and slides onto the stool opposite him. Donghyuck glances up and looks Mark up and down, then goes back to his crisps.

“You smell good,” he comments off-handedly, wiping his hands on his own jeans.

“You picked it, for my birthday,” Mark says. Donghyuck hums.

“I have good taste.” Donghyuck stands up. “Do you want to go upstairs?” Mark’s heart is kind of stuck in his throat, because Donghyuck has also obviously dressed up. He’s wearing a pair of tight, black jeans and what Mark knows is his favourite t-shirt, a faded Michael Jackson graphic about three sizes too large. Mark tears his eyes away and nods, following Donghyuck up a narrow, rickety staircase up to the second floor. This is when the nature of The Vision really becomes apparent–the music is low, rough, and the dancing isn’t… isn’t exactly kid-friendly. Or, like, Mark-friendly. Mark feels his ears redden and sees Donghyuck laughing at him out of the corner of his eye.

“I keep forgetting how inexperienced you are.” Donghyuck laughs, then puts a hand on Mark’s arm. “Do you want to leave?”

“No. No, I’m… I’m good. I’m cool,” Mark says, nodding a few times too many. Donghyuck stares at him for a few moments, searching, before nodding and leaning back.

Mark probably shouldn’t be surprised they end up kissing in the middle of the dance floor. They’d stayed on the edge of everything for a while, bopping a bit to the beat and shouting about something funny Donghyuck’s professor had done, until a song Donghyuck liked came on and he dragged Mark onto the dance floor. Now Donghyuck’s hands are fisted in Mark’s hair, and Mark’s hands are on Donghyuck’s hips, and Donghyuck has his mouth on Mark’s. Mark had been a bit self-conscious about it at first, but literally nobody was paying them any attention, and Donghyuck kept murmuring _It’s okay_ and _Don’t worry about it_ and _Tell me to stop and I will_ , and Mark would, stupidly, trust Donghyuck with his life.

· · ·

“It’s fine! It’s not even that high!” Donghyuck shouted from the bottom of the waterslide, splashing some water in Mark’s general direction. Mark was already holding up the queue, and the seventeen-year-old managing the queue was beginning to sigh pointedly.

“Are you sure?” Mark shouted back, still gripping the sides of the slide as tight as he can.

“Yeah! It’s made for kids, Mark, they wouldn’t let four-year-olds on it if it wasn’t safe!” Mark closes his eyes and launches himself down the slide.

He ends up breaking his collarbone, and the waterpark closes the slide the next day.

But Mark still trusts Donghyuck, because after all, the slide had been completely fine for over fifteen years when Mark got on it, and Donghyuck had gotten down the slide completely safe and sound just before Mark.

· · ·

They still don’t talk about it. Mark had cornered Jaemin, Jeno and Renjun after practise and told them to lay it off because he and Donghyuck weren’t dating, and something about his pleas must have gotten through, because now they all look apologetic whenever they see him.

They still don’t talk about it, but it keeps happening, and unhappening afterward, because there are never any traces of it. It’s always somewhere, never anywhere anybody could recognise them, and they always make sure they’re presentable when they leave. That’s probably Mark’s favourite part of it–he and Donghyuck, crammed into a small bathroom to fix each other’s hair and straighten each other’s shirts. Donghyuck laughs at how red and shaky Mark gets, and Mark tugs Donghyuck’s hair back out of place until he gets a swat to the stomach.

They still don’t talk about it, and Mark’s ribcage feels like it’s getting smaller every time it happens.

On one hand, nothing has changed. They still have lunch at the same table in the cafeteria and comment everyone who passes (Spinach Girl and Dickens Guy are dating now, and Donghyuck claims rights to wake Mark up early on a Saturday of Donghyuck’s choice). Donghyuck still insults Mark’s taste in movies over text, and Mark keeps teasing Donghyuck about his not-taste in music.

On the other hand, everything has changed. Some nights, Donghyuck calls him, and they end up at The Vision. Or they’re in one of the study rooms in the library. Or, on rare weekends, they’re in Mark’s brother Johnny’s car. As much as he’s kissed Donghyuck these past two months, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to it. He still gets dizzy, and even though the most scandalous thing that’s happened is Donghyuck drawing small circles on his sides under his shirt, he still shivers and gets so shaky that they have to sit in the car and talk about nothing for at least half an hour before he’s steady enough to drive home.

Today, Mark is a little worried about Donghyuck. He knows he had an exam in Mechanics this morning that he’s studied for, but he won’t answer any of Mark’s texts. Mark thinks he shares that class with Jeno, so he’s texted him too, but Jeno doesn’t know anything either. He’s just finished eating some instant noodles when there’s a knock on the door, and Mark almost trips over his own feet getting there. It’s Donghyuck, wrapped in one of Mark’s hoodies he didn’t even know he’d stolen and with a shifty expression.

“I’ve been looking for that hoodie,” Mark says, just to say something. Donghyuck shrugs.

“Can we watch The Notebook?”

· · ·

“Do we have to watch The Notebook?” Mark groaned, collapsing onto the sofa. Donghyuck’s eyes widened.

“What do you mean _do we have to_ – Mark, you’re talking about the greatest romance film ever produced.” Donghyuck climbed up next to Mark and dumped an armful of blankets on him.

“I thought that was Titanic,” Mark argued half-heartedly, and Donghyuck scoffed.

“She lets him _die_ , Mark. These two stay together even after she’s forgotten him. They grow old together. There’s no greater romance than that.” Donghyuck paused, glancing at Mark. “If you still want to watch Titanic you can get out.” Mark laughs a little and yanks a blanket from Donghyuck.

“Nah, let’s watch the greatest romance film ever produced.”

· · ·

This is probably the sixtieth time Mark has watched The Notebook with Donghyuck, so he doesn’t really feel the need to pay that much attention. Instead, he’s trying to figure Donghyuck out. He’d just slipped under Mark’s arm into his apartment as soon as he’d agreed to watch The Notebook, and then had just sat quietly on the sofa as Mark set up his laptop and ran around to find the DVD player and then to find the DVD and then to make popcorn. Now, he still hasn’t touched the popcorn, and he’s not actually watching the movie. At first he was picking at a thread on the armrest, but now he’s moved to pick at a thread in Mark’s shirt.

“What’s that thread ever done to you?” Mark asks after a few minutes, aiming for a light-hearted and teasing tone. It falls kind of flat between them as Donghyuck just shrugs. “What’s wrong?” Mark tries again.

“Nothing,” Donghyuck says and turns back to the movie.

“How did your test go?” Mark redirects a little.

“It went well, can we please watch the movie?” Donghyuck says, exasperated, and Mark raises his eyebrows. Donghyuck sighs.

“It actually went okay. Stop worrying.” Another fifteen minutes pass, and Mark would bet a whole night’s worth of sleep that Donghyuck isn’t registering any of the dialogue. All of a sudden Donghyuck moves, climbing into Mark’s lap with his knees bracketing Mark’s hips. Mark blinks dumbly up at him.

“I thought you wanted to watch the movie?” Mark says hesitantly. Donghyuck puts Mark’s hands on his hips.

“I changed my mind. Do you?” Mark shakes his head, so Donghyuck leans down to press a kiss to the corner of his mouth. “This is more fun, anyway,” he whispers, and Mark swallows. Donghyuck’s lips are a little chapped, and he probably hasn’t had a shower for a little too long, but Mark doesn’t mind, tightening his grip on Donghyuck’s hips. Donghyuck kisses him almost desperately, and Mark follows him, opening his mouth to accept whatever Donghyuck gives him. His breathing starts to get a little uneven, and he feels his hands shaking on Donghyuck’s hips. Donghyuck’s hands slide down Mark’s chest to play with the hem of Mark’s shirt, and Mark has to catch his breath. Donghyuck moves to kiss down the column of his throat, and Mark’s knee jerks. There’s something hot swirling at the pit of his stomach, and his heart feels like it’s going to beat out of his ribcage. Donghyuck leans back, still playing with the hem of Mark’s shirt. “Can I take this off?” he asks, looking at Mark. There’s something about how he looks right then that makes Mark’s heart clench. Donghyuck’s hair is messy, he’s drowning in one of Mark’s hoodies, and his lips are a little swollen. Mark swallows and nods. When Donghyuck still looks a little hesitant, Mark leans forward off the back of the couch to do it himself. It’s a little embarrassing as he leans back again, and Donghyuck takes a moment to look at Mark’s chest. He has a scar on his collarbone where he’d broken it at that waterpark, and he knows he has a few birthmarks here and there. Overall, Mark wouldn’t say he’s too harsh on the eyes, but he wouldn’t ever go so far as to say he’s anywhere near handsome. But the way Donghyuck is looking, he almost believes it.

“Like what you see?” Mark teases, because that’s the only way he knows how to deal with Donghyuck. Donghyuck smiles a little.

“Sure,” he agrees, smiling, and leans down to kiss Mark again. It almost feels loving, which is completely uncharted territory. Mark is shivering, not sure if he’s too hot or too cold, and Donghyuck’s hands are all over Mark’s chest, burning his skin where they skate across his ribs. Mark slips his hands under Donghyuck’s–Mark’s–hoodie, earning him an approving hum. Donghyuck’s skin almost feels feverish under Mark’s palms, and Donghyuck makes another encouraging noise as Mark starts drawing little circles on his waist with his thumb. Mark’s heart is full, his chest so full of love he thinks he might burst. Donghyuck leaves his mouth to kiss down his neck again, and at one spot just under Mark’s ear, Mark’s breath hitches. He can feel Donghyuck smile against his throat, feels the little huff of breath as he lets out a little laugh, then holds back another gasp as Donghyuck kisses the spot again. Mark screws his eyes shut and grips Donghyuck’s waist tighter as Donghyuck bites his throat lightly, and his breath hitches again as Donghyuck blows cool air over the bite.

“I love you,” Mark gasps. Donghyuck freezes, and Mark’s brain reels. “Wait, shit, shit, shit, fuck, Donghyuck–” But Donghyuck is scrambling off his lap and rushing out of the door. Mark lets his head fall back against the back of the couch, closing his eyes. “Shitshitshit _shit_ –”

· · ·

The first real fight Mark and Donghyuck had was unbelievably stupid. Mark had forgotten to tell Donghyuck he had a re-test during his lunch period, and Donghyuck had thought that Mark had finally realised he was too good for Donghyuck and eaten lunch with someone else. It had gotten just as dramatic as these petty fights can get when you’re a sophomore, and they hadn’t spoken for a week. Donghyuck had been furious and refused to let Mark explain, and Mark had been mad because Donghyuck was wrong and there was no universe in which he’d ever leave Donghyuck to eat lunch with anyone else. It had kind of escalated until Haknyeon cornered Mark after school and Mark could explain why Haknyeon’s little brother was so sad. When Mark had explained, he’d laughed for a solid five minutes and then invited Mark over for dinner so he and Donghyuck could talk about it.

· · ·

Mark has a small bruise on his throat, right under his ear, that he does his very best not to look at as he washes his face the next morning. It’s too high up to hide with a hoodie or turtleneck, and Mark’s hair is too short to comb over it, so Mark just sighs and steels himself for teasing questions.

It probably shouldn’t be surprising that Donghyuck isn’t at lunch. But still, it hurts, and Mark’s not sure he’s hungry anymore. He hasn’t eaten lunch alone since he and Donghyuck had their big fight in sophomore year of high school. Spinach Girl and Dickens Guy look sympathetically at Mark as they walk past.

Mark is antsy, glancing at the clock every couple of minutes to count down the seconds until basketball practise starts. He’s looking forward to doing some shouting and having something to focus on, getting into his team captain headspace and leaving everything else in the locker room. All of these things are not-Donghyuck things to think about, which Mark needs after a whole day of lectures he hasn’t paid any attention to.

Of course that’s not at all what happens. As soon as he walks through the door, Jaemin laughs and claps his hands.

“Hah! I told you they were dating!” This is hissed at Jeno and Renjun, who look a little uncomfortable. Mark slams his locker shut.

“I am not dating Donghyuck,” he snaps. “Change and get out on the court, we have a game next Friday.” He hears Renjun whisper something to Jeno as he yanks the door open, but doesn’t bother to find out what as he stalks down the short corridor onto the court.

· · ·

Donghyuck is staring at his own letter, reading it over and over until Mark yanks it from him. Mark reads two lines, then jumps off the sofa to wrap Donghyuck in a hug, laughing.

“I can’t believe you did it! _We_ did it!” Mark is still laughing, and Donghyuck is starting to come back to reality, starting to laugh a little.

“We’re going to U of T,” Donghyuck says, still looking a bit out of it.

“We’re going to U of T,” Mark repeats, grinning, and all of a sudden Donghyuck’s sobbing on Mark’s shoulder. “Hey, hey, it’s all good, we’re going to U of T, and you’ll study Civil Engineering and I’ll study Mathematics and Computing Science and we’ll eat lunch in the cafeteria together and we’ll, we’ll, study in the library and have coffee in little coffee shops and it’ll be the best.” Donghyuck’s still crying, but now he’s laughing, too, and Mark’s heart stutters a little.

“I’m crying because I’m happy, you idiot,” Donghyuck hiccups, and Mark giggles a little.

· · ·

Mark tries to not think of anything other than the team in the locker room before Friday’s game. Jaemin has actually been cutting back on his coffee, and has been playing really well at practise. Renjun and Jaemin both assure Mark that they’ve made sure Jeno has had a good night’s sleep, and Jisung is quiet as usual, doing his best not to get nervous. At this point they’re all just sitting around, waiting for the referee to tell them to come and warm up. Renjun sidles up to Mark, and Mark takes a deep breath to steel himself.

“Is Donghyuck coming?” Renjun asks, and Mark was not steeled enough for that question. He forces himself to stay calm and not think about how Donghyuck hasn’t answered a single text since Mark fucked up.

“I don’t know,” Mark says calmly. Because he doesn’t.

“He’s always here, though,” Jeno chimes in. “I’m sure he’ll be here, Mark.” Mark forces himself to smile at Jeno.

“Have you told him how you feel?” Jaemin asks from next to Jeno, looking up from whatever he’d been pretending to do on his phone.

“Have I what?” Mark asks icily. Jaemin visibly shrinks, but Mark is tired of backing down.

“Have you told him how you feel, Mark, it’s a perfectly reasonable question,” Renjun says, a little testily.

“I have, as a matter of fact, which is why he won’t be coming today,” Mark snaps. Jeno, who had been about to say something, shuts his mouth and Jaemin even has the sense to look a little guilty.

“Leave him alone, guys,” Jisung says quietly. Mark should be grateful for Jisung’s sense and for his intention of saving Mark from further grilling, but all he feels is an urge to throw a basketball at all of them.

· · ·

“Hey, is this seat taken?” A tanned boy with round cheeks was standing at Mark’s desk.

“Yeah, no, go ahead,” Mark said, moving his bag to give the boy more space. The boy was wearing a Michael Jackson t-shirt, and has a Mario Kart pin on his backpack. Mark glanced at his own backpack, which used to be his sister Irene’s, and was floral with a little glow-in-the-dark heart keychain dangling from a zipper. The boy pulled up a bag of Skittles and offered it to Mark.

“I like your backpack. Which Skittles do you like?”

· · ·

Mark plays the worst game he’s ever played. By the time they’re back in the locker rooms, all the fight has gone out of him and he just slumps onto a bench. Renjun props him up on one side and Jeno on the other, Jaemin squatting in front of him with a hand on his knee.

“We’re really sorry,” Jeno says. Jisung is sitting on the bench back-to-back with Mark’s, and puts his chin on Mark’s shoulder. Mark just sighs and can’t bring himself to look at any of them.

“It’s not your fault. I’m sorry I played like shit,” Mark says, twisting his hands and braiding his fingers and unbraiding them again.

“It’s not your fault,” Renjun echoes. “Your focus was elsewhere, it’s understandable.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” Jaemin asks. Mark considers the offer, which Jaemin seems to take as a yes. “How long have you known each other?”

“He transferred to my class freshman year of high school,” Mark answers, thinking about how happy Donghyuck had been when Mark had told him he liked the green and purple Skittles, because he only liked the yellow and orange ones. Mark tells them this, and he might be crying a little bit when he tells them about all the sleepovers they used to have, and about how whoever won that night’s Mario Kart tournament got the bed and whoever lost slept on the mattress on the floor, and about how Donghyuck used to let Mark sleep in the bed even though Donghyuck always won because Mark was such a light sleeper. After a while, the others stop responding and Mark runs out of words. Eventually the silence gets weird, so Mark opens his eyes and lifts his head. Jaemin is looking at the door, and Renjun pats his knee.

“There’s someone, um, someone here to see you?” Jeno says, glancing between Mark and a spot over his shoulder.

“No,” Mark says. “No, sorry, life doesn’t work like that. People don’t just show up in locker rooms after big sports games–” Someone clears their throat at the door. Mark wipes at his eyes and turns around, scowling. Donghyuck is standing just inside the door, looking the most meek and apologetic Mark’s ever seen him. Jaemin glances between Mark and Donghyuck.

“Should we… Do you want us to stay or do you two want to talk?” Jaemin asks after a few moments. Mark glances at Donghyuck, then nods.

“We should… We should probably talk,” Mark says, leaning to shift his weight off Jeno’s shoulder so he can get up. Renjun pats his knee again, and Jisung ruffles his hair just because he can. “Thanks, guys.” Renjun smiles.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“We’ll see you at practise on Monday, right?” Jisung asks, and Mark nods. Then they all file out the door past a very flustered-looking Donghyuck, Jaemin smiling at about half his usual wattage and Renjun outright glaring as they walk past. When the door clicks shut behind them, it’s all very quiet.

“I guess I watch too many cheesy movies,” Donghyuck says, smiling a little. Mark tries to smile and fails, refusing to look at Donghyuck. “Can I…” Donghyuck takes a step closer. “Can I sit?” Mark shrugs, so Donghyuck sits down a respectable distance from Mark.

“How have you been?” Mark asks, still not looking at Donghyuck. “It’s been, what, two weeks?” It’s been exactly eleven days, not that Mark’s counting.

“It’s, um, eleven days.” Mark scoffs. “Look, I’ve–” Mark sighs. “Okay, I get that just running away like that is a dick move, but can you listen for one minute?” Mark has half a mind to argue just for the sake of it, just to lash out and get it out of his system, but decides against it. “I may or may not have heard about half of what you were telling the others, and I just…”

“You’re adding eavesdropping to your list of achievements?” Mark asks bitterly.

“That’s so _dumb_ , Mark Lee.” Donghyuck takes a breath. “Listen to me, _please_.” Mark shuts up.

“I was… I hadn’t realised you’d loved me for that long.”

“How can you not have? I’ve literally been making heart eyes at you since we met! Your _brother_ knows I’m in love with you,” Mark snaps, turning his head to look at Donghyuck. Donghyuck looks a bit taken aback.

“Wait, Haknyeon– Whatever. The _point_ is,” Donghyuck takes another breath. “The point is, I, um. I love you too? And I thought you said it as a sort of heat-of-the-moment thing, and I kinda panicked because I really couldn’t deal with you only loving me when we, well, um. When I was kissing you, and I just. Didn’t know how to deal with that.” Mark looks at Donghyuck.

“How do you think I’ve been feeling for the past two months?” he asks, anger rising. “For two months, you kept kissing me and telling me it meant nothing! How the actual fuck did you expect that to turn out?” Donghyuck looks stunned for a moment.

“Honestly, I wasn’t really thinking,” he admits, and Mark deflates.

“Of course you weren’t,” he huffs.

“No, all I knew was that I was in love with you and that I didn’t want to ruin our friendship, and if you’re not dating you can’t break up… I just thought kissing you without any meaning to it would be some sort of solution.” Donghyuck shrugs. “I hadn’t really thought it through the first time it happened, and not really the second time either. After that it just became a habit, I guess.” Mark nods. He really doesn’t want to fight Donghyuck anymore, he just wants to put his face in his hair and smell his mango shampoo. And it’s not like he doesn’t understand Donghyuck’s reasoning.

They sit in silence for a while. Mark glances over at Donghyuck. He’s wearing one of Mark’s hoodies, and he’s fiddling with the hem of it, picking at threads and scratching at a little hole right near the seam. Mark looks down at his own hands, twisted in his lap with bitten nails. He takes a breath and manages to work up an ounce of courage.

“Can we talk a bit more about that part where you said you were in love with me?” Mark asks quietly. Donghyuck laughs and swats Mark’s shoulder. Mark squeaks a little, clutching his shoulder and giggling.

“Okay, sure.” Donghyuck stops laughing and squares his shoulders. “Wait, I want to do this properly.”

“Just do it like you would! You’ll never be Ryan Gosling,” Mark giggles, and Donghyuck laughs again, the mood lighter.

“Shut up! The Notebook is the greatest romance film ever produced, and I can totally be as dramatically romantic as Noah!” Mark giggles and forces the smile from his face.

“Go on, I’m listening.” Donghyuck giggles and swats his shoulder again.

“Mark Lee,” he starts dramatically, then starts laughing. “Shut up! Wait, I can do this.” He takes a deep breath. “Mark Lee, I think you’re an absolute fucking idiot, and I still, somehow, have been in love with you ever since we got our university acceptance letters and you comforted me because you thought I was sad.” Mark pauses for a moment, then laughs.

“You’re _still_ insulting me! Have you ever said a single sentence in your life that hasn’t begun or ended with some sort of insult?” Donghyuck laughs too, then pretends to think about it.

“Maybe?” he says, and Mark snorts. “Did my confession work?”

“Sure,” Mark says amiably, smiling.

“Good. Come here,” Donghyuck says and puts a hand on Mark’s neck to pull him in.

“I mean it, though,” Mark breathes when there’s mere centimetres between them. “I love you.”

“And I think I just made it very clear that I love you, too. _Please_ kiss me.” And what’s Mark gonna do, say no?

**Author's Note:**

> How do you end stories??
> 
> (I'm so sorry I couldn't fit everyone in, but it just didn't feel natural to shove in more characters just for the sake of it).


End file.
